Happy Birthday, Shakespeare?

For those of you who still believe…

Shaksper's Birthday

What form of gift befits the Stratford Man
In glad commemoration of that day
On which the life of Avon’s Bard began?
I proffer here suggestions, if I may…Perhaps a lay in shrill falsetto sung
By minstrel gay, in pied velour bedecked?
Or fool’s gold nuggets, dull, but neatly strung?
Or wax bananas, true-to-life, correct?

Perhaps a powdered wig, some nice perukes?
From Fred’rick’s store in Hollywood, perchance,
A pair of fake, yet sassy, maxi-glutes
One’s nonexistent tush made to enhance?

No book of Ossian, bust of Ba’al, toupee…
Can best the literary world’s trompe l’oeil!

Special thanks to my dear Oxfordian friend, Ann Zakelj, for this original poem!
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